No Gators Will Escape In Florida, They Said. Everything Will Be Fine, They Said


Narrator: They all escaped.

“We have a detailed hurricane procedure in place,” said park director Mike Hileman. “We have double fences, a large perimeter fence that goes around the entire property.”

Hileman was so convinced that their Gators will not go free that he added, “If you see an alligator floating down the street right by your house, it ain’t ours.”

But when HuffPost ran with the headline “Gator Park…Promises None Will Escape”, people suddenly became afraid of the very real threat of alligators escaping in flood waters — and absolutely no one was reassured.

Sure, two-thousand-alligator park, sure.”

Some pointed out how this is exactly what someone would say as their famous last words BEFORE THOUSANDS OF ALLIGATORS SWAM LOOSE.

The “promise” reminded many of famous plot lines of movie franchises like Sharknado and Jurassic Park.


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